Wednesday, July 14, 2010

Deep Thoughts with Michael & Jamie

Does anybody remember the Saturday Night Live skit "Deep Thoughts by Jack Handey?" I'm pretty sure Jamie had her own "deep thoughts" moment as we were eating dinner together last night (and might I add, dinner was delicious).

Jamie: When Chaucer burps and poots, it doesn't even phase him.
Michael: What do you mean?
Jamie: Well as loud as it always is, you think he would say "excuse me."
Michael: Jamie, he's a dog. He doesn't understand how to say "excuse me," and that an apology is even warranted.
Jamie: You'd think he'd at least go...(at this point, Jamie pauses and makes an expression. The expression reflects the facial display of a retarded orangutan passing gas).

Oddly enough, we preceded with our meal as if no retarded orangutan passing gas facial expression was ever made. And Chaucer continued eating his piece of ice.

This has been "Deep Thoughts with Michael and Jamie."

(cue dreamy music)

Tuesday, July 13, 2010


If I need a to pick up a gallon of milk during the evening or fulfill a seemingly insatiable chocolate craving, you will probably find me at the Dollar General around the corner from my house. The milk is usually overpriced, but hey, you can't beat the convenience.

I found myself in need of a gallon of overpriced milk one evening, so I got dressed and scurried in the Dollar General. I searched the milk to find one from the batch with the longest expiration date. I ran up to the counter to pay. Looking back, I'm not even sure I so much as greeted the cashier (rude, I know). But the cashier surprised me. She quickly said, "You know, I've been meaning to tell you something (she obviously recognized me from previous visits). You know that show 'My Name is Earl?' You remind me of Earl, with the hair." I said, "I'm not sure if that's a good thing or a bad thing," and she responded, "It be a good thing. Because Earl is funny and he really has a good heart."

What other people think of me has never really bothered me, but I'll be honest: Dollar General cashier's comment did make me go look in the mirror.