Monday, January 4, 2010

Ringin' In the New Year

Faithful Ford Retort readers, happy 2010!

To celebrate the dawning of a new year, Jamie, the Usual Suspects, and myself made a quick trip down I-20 to the River City, Vicksvegas! We opted this year to take a leave of absence from our so-far customary celebration at the Peabody in Memphis (in reality, any time white folks decide not to dance, we're all better off for it).

Yes, yes...I know, I don't have to tell's what you've really been waiting for: the quotes! So if you were with Jamie, the Usual Suspects, and me, you just might have heard these things said:
  • "I'm going to introduce myself as Carol Anne's illegitimate son. Do you think that will be a problem?"
  • "Act like you're supposed to be here."
  • "What is that smell?"
  • "If you do that again, I'm throwing you in jail."
  • "I danced with Nick Jonas at my party!"
  • "Next year, I'm paying for everybody to go to Memphis."
  • "Hey, John/Amanda, there's a lifetime client. You can retire off her mouth!"
  • "This ain't's 61 North!"
  • "The Winsty baby!"
  • "Is that a goat in the back of that guy's truck?"
  • "And the third guy said, 'My favorite style is rodeo style.'"
  • "You're not going to believe who just texted me..."
  • "If you're going to have a wreck, do it big. I don't want to limp away from this."
  • "I don't think so, Scooter."
  • "Yeah, it's running down my shirt. I win."
  • "Wei-mar-rain-ner"
  • "Six people can fit in her van."
  • "Twenty dollars fell out of her pocket."
  • "Double down, baby!"
  • "He can't even finish and keep a straight face."
To the Usual Suspects, all my love! By the way, I looked at our picture from last year, and we haven't aged a bit.

Faithful Ford Retort readers, let's keep on rockin' and rollin'. I genuinely hope this year brings you bigger portions of joy and victories than heartache and defeats. May your tears of laughter greatly outnumber your tears of sadness. Love like you're leaving for the last time and give more than you receive. Frown on injustice and never miss a chance to put yourself in someone else's shoes.

And most importantly: keep looking to Mount Calvary. Grace and peace!

1 comment:

Jamie Ford said...

I love FOBUMU...LOTS!!