Wednesday, July 2, 2008

Clothes Log

Truth is sought for its own sake. And those who are engaged upon the quest for anything for its own sake are not interested in other things. Finding the truth is difficult, and the road to it is rough. - Ibn al-Haytham

One household topic of discussion that Jamie and I bicker about is her closet. In our new home, we have separate closets (nothing short of unadulterated bliss). Yet even though I can choose to ignore the unholy abyss (Jamie's closet), I play mind games with myself. I'll think, "Michael, don't look in her need to torment yourself," but I give in to the urge, just like a kid indulges the impulse to pick his nose at the table (or I give in to the urge to concurrently eat 6 packs of Sour Punch Straws). So I glance in her closet and go berserk!

Jamie has clothes everywhere. Clothes, clothes, clothes. In the interest of full disclosure, I must say that I do not lack for any nice clothes. So what is the difference between Jamie and me? I wear all of my clothes.

Last night, in the heat of the argument, I came out and said it: "Jamie, loving wife, you have too many clothes." She balked and said I have too many clothes. And I retorted that I actually wear my clothes, not collect them. So after some hemming and hawing, I agreed to remain silent about her closet if she would agree to participate in a my experiment.

To test my accusation, Jamie and I will be keeping a clothes log. Every day for 6 months, I will log what we wear in an Excel spreadsheet. Even though you may find my task tedious, I'm very excited about recording hard data that vindicates what I know to be true. Some of you with razor-sharp mind might be thinking, "Hey, wait a minute, Jamie wears scrubs to work." My point exactly. I'll keep you, faithful Ford Retort reader, abreast of our findings.

1 comment:

Jason said...

Hilarious, It never ceases to amaze me the lengths you are willing to go to prove your point., you better be visiting me. I just put a great find up for the world to see. I want to see some comments from you! Keep up the good work man, I am still trying to get your blog on the "Blogs of Note" section everyone so desperately wants to be a part of!