Wednesday, April 23, 2008

Dirty Jobs


The Ford Retort exists for several reasons. The primary reason: people need to know what I, Michael E. Ford, think about things. A secondary reason? Well, the Ford Retort certainly strives to be a force for good...a force to promote ideals that are honorable and noble and salubrious...a force for change, yes, change for the better. So I summon and respectfully request your help:

I'm a big fan of the show Dirty Jobs on the Discovery Channel. Host Mike Rowe is indeed a hilarious man. His witty commentary as he traverses from dirty job to dirty job is delightful. Mike is a good guy (a former opera singer, actually), a guy that represents middle America.

Because Dirty Jobs is a show that brings me great pleasure, my desire is to do one thing: wear a Dirty Jobs t-shirt. So I clicked over to the Discovery Store, in search of the aforementioned t-shirt. Only one problem: it doesn't exist. I sent a polite but direct email to the Discovery Store and told them of their error. A representative promptly replied back and said that a Dirty Jobs t-shirt is currently not on the agenda. Come on guys, give me a break.

As a Southern Baptist, boycotts are ingrained in my DNA (seriously, we boycott all sin). The Ford Retort is officially calling for a boycott of the Discovery Store until they stock official Dirty Jobs t-shirts. Really, Discovery Store, has it come to this? Poking me, the Dirty Jobs fan, in the eye is not a sagacious move to make; therefore, there will be consequences.

Boycotters, for good Karma and general spiritual unity, I would suggest listening to the Dirty Jobs song, getting it stuck in your head, and humming it a couple of hours a day.

1 comment:

Rusty said...

Why don't you try e-mailing Mike himself? Surley he has a blog page or his own web-site. I imagine Mike's the kind of guy that would back fans such as you and I up and go to bat for us without having to boycott anything.